Friday, May 14, 2021

Blood Of The Vines - Monster Kids

Pairing‌‌‌ ‌‌‌wine‌‌‌ ‌‌‌with‌‌‌ ‌‌‌movies!‌‌‌  ‌‌‌See‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌hear‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌fascinating‌‌‌ ‌‌‌commentary‌‌‌ ‌‌‌for‌‌‌ ‌‌‌these‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌movies‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌many‌‌‌ ‌‌‌more‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌at‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌From‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Hell.‌‌‌  This week, our three movies are about monsters and kids.  How are we to tell them apart?

For fans of movies, nothing stirs them quite like a movie about movie fans.  Ask anyone in the seats at the New Beverly Cinema, which is slated to reopen on June 1st.  My wife is so excited about being at the grand reopening.  I asked her what film they'd be showing and she replied, "What’s it matter?  The New Bev's back!"  I would imagine a lot of the regulars feel the same way.

Fade To Black is a 1980 psych-thriller which centers on a young movie buff who kicks it up a notch.  He tires of being the downtrodden movie geek and starts taking his revenge on those who offend him, one by one, dressed as different characters from classic movies.  

I can understand the scare from Dracula, the Mummy or a James Cagney gangster, but Hopalong Cassidy as a horror vehicle seems like a reach.  One may as well dress for Halloween as Roy Rogers.  Or Trigger.

Colorado's Left Hand Brewing has a stout named Fade To Black, which they say lends itself to a "feeling of self loathing, burnt opportunities and smoked relationships."  Mmmm.  Six-pack or case?  

1987's The Monster Squad pits a group of kids against the monsters.  The Mummy, Wolfman, Frankenstein's monster and Gill-man step right out of the old Universal pictures into the real world.  The young 'uns try to rid the earth of the movie monsters come-to-life by throwing them through a wormhole.  Does it work?  I'll only say that we are still here today, aren't we?  Thanks, kids.

I ran across a recipe for a cocktail called Monster Squad - one part Jagermeister and three parts Monster energy drink.  Both ends of that recipe are a little sick-making for me, so I'll let you deal with it on your own.  As a barista once told me when I ordered an espresso and Jolt cola, "you have any problems with that, dial 9-1-1."

Children of the Damned came out of Great Britain in 1964 as a sequel to 1960's Village of the Damned.  The one-sheet warns us to "beware the eyes that paralyze," and that's damned good advice.  These kids turn out to be the monsters they seem to be, capable of murder and thought to be a threat to humanity.  Now, if the military could do something about my neighbor's little monsters, that would be a damned fine ending.

Faust Wines of Napa Valley used to produce a wine called The Damned, but that is no longer the case, ruining a damned easy wine pairing.  But wait - Damned Mountain is a New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc which the importer claims is restrained.  When was the last time you had a restrained Sauv Blanc from New Zealand?  I won't call them damned liars even though it would be thematically perfect.

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