Friday, March 15, 2024

Blood Of The Vines - Death Wishes

Pairing‌‌‌ ‌‌‌wine‌‌‌ ‌‌‌with‌‌‌ ‌‌‌movies!‌‌‌  ‌‌‌See‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌hear‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌fascinating‌‌‌ ‌‌‌commentary‌‌‌ ‌‌‌for‌‌‌ ‌‌‌these‌‌‌ movies‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌many‌‌‌ ‌‌‌more‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌at‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌From‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Hell.‌‌‌ ‌ This week we raise our glasses to three films which point out that, though comedy may be difficult, death is a bitch.

2002's Death to Smoochy was directed by Danny DeVito, who also appeared in the film, along with Robin Williams, Edward Norton, Jon Stewart and a host of immediately recognizable character actors. Despite the wealth of talent, Smoochy died a thousand deaths. To say that nobody liked it would be inaccurate, but not too far off the mark. 

Williams plays the host of a TV kiddie show who suffers a debilitating scandal and loses everything he holds dear. How could a comedy with that premise not find an audience? Well, you could ask Bobcat Goldthwait. He did Shakes the Clown a decade before Smoochy, to a similar absence of ticket purchasers. Obviously the general public doesn't see the humor in these movies like I do. 

The disgraced kiddie host funnels his anger towards his replacement, a guy who plays the character of Smoochy the Rhino. Even though Smoochy is the target of numerous failed attempts to get him off the show, it's his cousin Moochy who ends up at the morgue. I'm not worried about this spoiler paragraph. It's not like knowing who dies is going to spoil it for you.

Monterey County's American Vintners has a line called Smooch. I know we're one letter short, but I couldn't resist. The Valentine box features a Cab, a Pinot, a red blend and a rosé for just $69. Value smooching at its finest. 

Death Wish came about in 1974, a time when the crime rate in big American cities was on the rise. The nation wanted a hero, one who was handy with a gun and could get over his non-violent stance with a little push. Enter Charles Bronson

I know he had good reason to adopt his vigilante stance, but this guy couldn't go to the grocery store without killing a couple of muggers on the way. I am reminded of the comment by a comic who spent part of his routine talking about the movies Taken, Taken 2 and Taken 3. The comment was, "Now you’re just being careless."

There were numerous sequels to Death Wish, as well as a whole subgenre of vigilante films that emulated it. 

Bounty Hunter makes a wine called The Vigilante and sells it for around $150 a bottle. It looks to be a Napa Cabernet Sauvignon made from grapes grown in Beckstoffer Vineyard, which earns them that top shelf price.

In 1975's Death Race 2000, a slightly futuristic America is consumed with a road race that is pure blood sport. The Roger Corman production shows a nation where, as the one sheet says, "hit and run driving is no longer a felony. It's a national sport." Think of it as America's Got Bad Drivers or America's Bloodiest Videos or Survivor, For Realz

The drivers are famous, they all have distinct personas and are followed by their fans the way a sports icon might be. In my teen years, when the ink on my driver's license was still wet, my cousins and I jokingly referred to a "points system" in driving. We would sarcastically mention how many points we would get for running down different types of pedestrians. Death Race 2000 removes the joking aspect from the scoring. 

Sonoma County's Adobe Road Winery has a line of racing themed wines, although they are intended to represent more serious racing than that of DR2000. The Racing Series features SHIFT, Apex, Carbon and Redline. They run from $50 and up and get a bit pricey if you buy the four- and six-bottle boxed sets.


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