Does drinking wine make us smarter, or does it just make us feel smarter? We have already seen how the resveratrol in wine means good things for our heart health, the battle against cancer and holding off Alzheimer's. Now, the National Institutes of Health have a report designed to scare the cocktail out of your hand. It says, "Alcohol interferes with the brain's communication pathways and can affect the way the brain looks and works." The way it looks? What do I care? The way it works? Hey, as long as I have enough juice to keep pumping out these articles on a weekly basis, make mine a Zinfandel.
From 1957, a classic year for both cars and sci-fi, comes The Brain from Planet Arous. It's as big as a car, this brain, and about as scary as one. It's not scary, not even a little. In fact, this movie was a favorite for my friends back in college. When it was slated for an airing on Friday night's Fear Theater, we knew it was time to open a few and laugh out loud. The brains, there are two of them, are named Gor and Vol, if memory serves. Apparently brains on the Planet Arous favor one syllable names. Easier for a big brain to remember.
Domaine du Mortier offers a wine called Brain de Folie Chenin Blanc. In case you’re wondering, brain de folie is a French expression for hangover, that thing you'll have after a wine-soaked viewing of The Brain from Planet Arous.
I failed to mention that the brains from Arous possess people. Well, one possesses a dog. Damn, now I've given it away. Here is another film featuring a brain that takes over. Donovan's Brain, from 1953, has a mad scientist type who is operating on a rich guy who was in a car crash. It looks like the guy isn’t going to pull through. "Hey, mind if I just take your brain?"
That was his first mistake. Never take a guy's brain unless you know how to use it. The brain from Mr. Donovan is a real troublemaker. You can't stop it, you can only hope to slow it down. But, actually, you can stop it. The film's climax owes something to Ben Franklin.
Let's go to sunny southern Oregon for a wine to pair with Donovan's Brain. L. Donovan Wines has a Malbec that was grown in the Rogue Valley. Linda Donovan says it sports flavors of blackberry and chocolate. That sounds like perfect brain food to me.
I don't know about you, but all this talk of brains has me hungry. The Brain Eaters, from 1958, are parasites who eat brains. There, that was simple. They are carried about in glass containers, which get broken every now and then, darn the luck. These parasites are somehow aiming to create a happy, strife-free existence on earth. By eating our brains? I think I lost the thread on that concept. It would be a far happier, more strife-free existence if we ate their brains, I would imagine. Like they say in the land of the crawfish, suck de head, bite de tail. By the way, that's one reason I let my honorary Cajun card lapse several decades ago.
But as long as we're talking crustaceans, let's talk Albariño, a crisp white wine that is perfectly suited for pairing with bug-like sea creatures. Tangent has a fine Central Coast bottling for $17, but you can step up to their special Block 163 Albariño for $35. Enjoy with your favorite gray matter crudités.
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