Blood Of The Vines - Movies That Aren't Really Movies

Pairing‌‌‌ ‌‌‌wine‌‌‌ ‌‌‌with‌‌‌ ‌‌‌movies!‌‌‌  ‌‌‌See‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌hear‌‌‌ ‌‌‌the‌‌‌ ‌‌‌fascinating‌‌‌ ‌‌‌commentary‌‌‌ ‌‌‌for‌‌‌ ‌‌‌these‌‌‌ ‌‌‌‌‌movies‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌and‌‌‌ ‌‌‌many‌‌‌ ‌‌‌more‌,‌‌ ‌‌‌at‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Trailers‌‌‌ ‌‌‌From‌‌‌ ‌‌‌Hell.‌‌‌  This week, a "very special" Blood of the Vines for the celebration of the USA's birthday.  The special that's not really special concerns movies that aren't really movies.  Pass the popcorn.

The 1974 film, Pardon My Blooper, presents the same sort of broadcast "misteaks" compiled by Kermit Schafer in his record albums of years previous.  Schafer probably popularized the word "blooper" - a flub or mistake by an announcer or actor - all by himself.  I had the "Pardon My Blooper" record in my teens, and was often amused by the entertaining cover art depicting a TV camera holding its lens, as if it had been punched in the face, and a radio microphone plugging its ears.  Well, I was easily amused in my teens.  I don't think that even then, the film version of Blooper would have held my interest for ten minutes.  It is amusing, though, to watch the staged segments in this movie.  The bad lighting is the same in all of them, and I think it's even the same actress in about half of them.

Yes, Virginia, the bloopers are phony.  Although Blooper is billed in the credits as a documentary, many of the gaffes were recreated in the studio, with limited casting and awful lighting.  Oh, the humanity.  

Celebrate the 4th of July with many clips of a guy who sounds like a newscaster saying "take a leak," instead of "take a look."  Spoonerisms, transposed words and saying "shitty" instead of "city."  That's blooper comedy, my friend.

You'll need booze to get through this one.  Fortunately, one of the more famous bloopers from early YouTube days concerned Georgia's Château Élan winery.  You can see it by Googling - or Binging, if you prefer - Grape Lady Epic Fail.  The TV reporter was trying to foot-stomp some grapes and took a tumble while doing so.  Try a Chambourcin, since that's what she stomping on when she slipped and fell.

Columbo Meets Scotland Yard was actually just a long TV show.  It aired in 1972 as the Columbo episode, "Dagger of the Mind," as one of the movie-length shows from the series.  This one has the disheveled detective in London, helping to investigate a murder.  What, not enough action in L.A. to suit Columbo?  At least his raincoat finally comes in handy.

Have a Scotch with Columbo, if only because of the meme showing a Columbo lookalike holding a Chivas Regal, under the words "so good if you have something to forget."  Of course, Columbo always remembered, if at the last minute.

Now, more television, as The Meanest Men in the West is actually two episodes of  "The Virginian" from the early '60s, TV's Western Era.  The trailer boasts that "Lee Marvin is mean, Charles Bronson is meaner."  What no mention of Chuck Norris?  The Mean Academy will have something to say about that. 

Is it just me, or was "The Virginian" the only TV series without any hooks at all?  (No offense to Lee J. Cobb fans).  I don't recall any Virginian catch phrases, running jokes, theme song or special episodes, even these two.  On a high note, one of the episodes was written and directed by Samuel Fuller and Charles Grodin appears in the other one.  Well, the series drew some great talent, so someone must have been watching it.

Gotta have a Virginia wine for the mean guys.  Stinson Vineyards makes a tough-guy rosé, from the brawny Tannat grape.  Rosé for The Meanest Men in the West?  That's why they started calling it Brosé, bro. 

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Bieber Brosé

Drink Pink: Meiomi Rosé

Everything’s coming up rosé at Whole Foods Markets, and that's good news for people looking for wines to pair with spring and summer get-togethers. They have a slew of pink wines that are easy on the palate and the pocketbook. Their marketing department offered a sample of a half dozen of their favorites, and I took 'em.

Meiomi Rosé 2016 is from all over California, 48% from Sonoma County, 43% from Monterey County and just nine percent from Santa Barbara County. Winemaker Melissa Stackhouse worked predominantly with Pinot Noir in this inaugural vintage.

The wine is produced in the saignée method, in which the juice is drained away from the skins and fermented in stainless steel tanks.  Alcohol is quiet, at 13.2% abv and the bottle retails for $23.

Light salmon in color, the Meiomi Rosé is so full of strawberry aromas my first inclination is to pick it, not drink it. There is a fresh greenness in there, too, along with a twist of orange peel. On the palate, strawberry leads light notes of cherry and currant. An invigorating acidity begs for a grilled calamari salad, or even oysters. The finish is slightly and deliciously tart, and lasts a long time. It’s a little more expensive than most of the rosés at Whole Foods this spring, but it is worth it.

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Three Nights Of L.A. Rosé

Rosé wine is more popular than ever now. Even the guys are getting into the pink. There's a good reason for rosé to be popular. It's delicious, it's refreshing, it's festive and it's food-friendly, not to mention pretty.

So, it’s great that there is a fantastic rosé wine event coming to Los Angeles in May. It's also coming to New York and London in June. It was just in Miami, and the winter event was held in New York.

It’s called La Nuit en Rosé - French for Rosé Night - and its organizers say  it is the world’s first food and wine tasting festival specializing in rosé wines. La Nuit en Rosé's founders contend that rosé wine is not just an emerging trend, but rather a movement that is here to stay. This culinary experience will highlight the diversity of rosé wines from all around the world.

The festival will span three big nights at Mondrian Los Angeles, May 13th-15th. Tickets are available by logging onto their website.

• Friday night  is a VIP Rosé Wine Pairing Dinner Under the Stars at Mondrian's Ivory on Sunset.

• Saturday night it’s a Rosé Sunset Soirée poolside at Skybar.

• Sunday afternoon, wrap up the weekend with a Rosé Pool Party, also poolside at Skybar.

May is thought to be "just right" for rosé, but don't forget that it's always a good time to drink pink.

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Four Rosés From Bonny Doon #3

I will admit right off the bat that Randall Grahm is one of my favorite winemakers, if not right at the top of the list.  It's what he does with rosé that really endears him to me. Imagine my glee to find that Grahm is now pushing not one, but four rosé wines. We are visiting each one this month, to get you ready for rosé weather, whatever that is.

2015 A Proper Pink

A rosé made with Tannat? 69% Tannat and 31% Canernet Franc? Thank you, Mr. Grahm. This Bonny Doon Vineyards oddball is a great rosé for a backyard barbecue. It takes a chill very well, but try it at cellar temperature - or even room temperature - first. The aromas and flavors are explosive and it’s an all-around fun champion.

The Tannat grapes come from Mt. Oso Vineyard in Tracy, California, between Livermore and Modesto.  The Cabernet Franc hails from the Fetzer family's Ceago Vineyards on the shores of Clear Lake.

Grahm let's loose his veddy British alter ego, Reginald ffrench-Postalthwaite, on the label. He offers a quip on the current trend of masculine types sipping the pink: “The beastly locution ‘Brosé’ (shudder) has even infiltrated the language of Disraeli, Gladstone and our beloved Winnie! I’ll tell you. Some of us ‘real men’ have been in touch with our, shall we say, more leeward side for some time now.”

Grahm writes of this inaugural A Proper Pink vintage that it is “the companion to A Proper Claret [fully red] and Gravitas [white] and while the Vin Gris de Cigare [light pink] is intended for more sober-minded occasions, this is definitely the less buttoned up in style.” It does let its middle-red hair down.

Looking just slightly off ruby red, this wine carries the full aroma and mouthfeel of a red. Rich strawberry on the nose is joined by an herbaceous quality that balances well. You can think of it as a fruit bomb - it’s certainly loaded with red fruit - but there is a green edge to it that brings a deeper dimension. Acidity is fabulous and the finish is lengthy. A Tannat/Cabernet Franc rosé? Here it is. It sits at a very proper 13% abv, sells for $16 and 3573 cases are available. But I'm sure they are going fast.

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